When Love Is Not Enough – The Road Ahead!

Every love story doesn’t end with the couple holding hands and walking away into the sunset. For every love story that could make the transition to a happy marriage, there are many that don’t because being in love isn’t enough. The journey – from first look you share with the one you love to the day you seal the bond with marriage – is long and arduous.

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The One That Got Away

Rejection is a bitter pill to swallow. When a bold declaration of love is met with silence, it disheartens even the bravest among us. Unrequited love can create doubts over the value of love, especially when sincere love is overlooked due to extraneous reasons of appearance, privilege and success. Sometimes you meet ‘the one’ for you but either fail to realize it or circumstances prevent you from coming together.

[Read More: How To Forget Your First Love In 9 Steps]

Romeo And Juliet – Then And Now

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In multi-cultural societies and families, especially the conservative ones oppose partners from different backgrounds, be it from a different class or faith or ethnicity. Several movies have portrayed the challenges young couples face from their partner’s families.

Two of J.Lo’s movies Monster-in-Law and Maid in Manhattan portray the challenges a young Latina faces in overcoming barriers of class and ethnicity to have her fairytale ending. Meet the Parents is a rom-com that perfectly captures the struggles of a young man in convincing his girl’s parents that he is a suitable partner.

In some cultures, this opposition takes on a violent and gruesome note ending in honour killings of couples violating cultural norms.

The struggles a same-sex couple undergoes in gaining social acceptance of their love is often the most difficult part of their journey together.

For young people, the balance seems to be shifting towards prioritizing their career needs and demands over any romantic entanglements. Some couples bid adieu to love when faced with conflicting career demands like going to a different university or moving to the big city for a job. Many of them do not consider finding/keeping love as a prerequisite to being happy and are perfectly content loving their friends, family and careers.

Clearly, several barriers to love exist from the couples themselves and from others. A positive take on it all would be to look at it as a test of love. It will reveal the strength of your love and working through obstacles together could only make your love stronger.

Every Rose Has Its Thorns

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Being in love is like beholding a rose, we are taken in by the beauty of the flower and are oblivious to the thorns around it. But relationships require much more than love to survive and thrive. Couples are not like two pieces of a jigsaw puzzle that come together perfectly. Your partner is not someone who completes you, but someone who complements you. If you are an introvert, he is not one who stands in for you at every party, rather an evening with him excites you to overcome your habitual reluctance. Love is not to complete you and it must not be your whole world or your only happiness. Love must enhance you and let you blossom in its wonderful care.

[Read More: 7 Major Reasons Why Love Is Important And How To Find Yours]

A Failed Love Is Not Always A Tragedy

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Those in love can hardly undertake a cold, detached appraisal of their partner’s strengths and flaws. They tend to overrate the first and underplay the latter. Lovers fail to anticipate the inevitable bumps along the road in the journey of love. Some couples believe too much in “love conquers all” and make light of even serious hurdles to the relationship. Often, friends and family are able to spot the differences and incompatibilities between a pair that would make trouble down the road. Most couples dismiss all doubts about their relationship and try to prove the naysayers wrong.

Smart couples lend an attentive ear to the concerns of their loved ones and try to know each other’s perspective on the same. When such couples fail to reach common ground on important issues, they resist the urge to take their relationship forward.

Lovers need not subscribe to the fairytale version of love where partners try to adjust to all and any differences to make the relationship work at any cost, even that of their own happiness. Love alone isn’t enough or even necessary for the pursuit of happiness in life and may bring on misery if it’s pursued blindly.

[Read More: 7 Couples Who Showed Us Why Breaking Up Is A Good Thing]

Sometimes It Lasts In Love, But Sometimes It Hurts Instead

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Finding love and keeping it are both matters of the heart. And when it comes down to the two individuals, it is more about the place love holds in their lives, their ability to adjust and their expectations from love. If love isn’t enough and the one you love is not the one you can grow old with, do not despair! Sometimes it takes a wrong turn to get you to the right place. Every wrong turn is only a detour that teaches a life lesson that helps us pick the right path. Every failed relationship is pushing us closer to a love that will outlast us.