Your Personal Guide To Writing The Perfect Love Letter

The love letter is a classic literary form that has been shaped by thousands of individuals through the ages, expressing the most important of human emotions from one to another. The reason the format of the love letter has stood the test of time so fantastically well is because a letter is the most individual and personal way to express your feelings for someone.

Whoever receives a love letter knows immediately that the author has invested time, energy and concentration to write to them, and this shows a degree of selflessness, generosity and love that we rarely show to others. It shows we really care for someone.

A Love Letter: Why It Works Best

A love letter is a deeply romantic way to make clear your feelings for your lover. The format of a good letter allows for the expression of some of the most intimate thoughts and feelings precisely because a letter is a uniquely private mode of communication.

The Perfect Love Letter

To receive a love letter is one of the most wonderful feelings that we can experience because it makes a person feel adored in a special way. It is tangible proof that someone was thinking of you, writing to you, and loving you so much, without you even being there.

Writing A Good Love Letter: The Basics

A good love letter shows that you have sat alone and been so wrapped up their thoughts that you had to write. This is a very powerful thing. It shows dedication, commitment and grace, and may mean the world to its recipient.

The Perfect Love Letter - The Basics

It shows you have patience, skill with words, and a huge amount of affection for your lover, but it need not be difficult to write. A beautiful love letter comes from a place of genuine affection. The simplest way to start is by thinking of the subject of your letter – that individual – and remembering their qualities, talents and attributes.

Make an image in your mind of all these positive aspects of the person and how they make you feel. Consider the important acts that they have done for you or others. Think of the times when they have made an impact on those around them, and the times when they were able to persevere through challenging circumstances. Try to build up a picture of these events and why they mean something to you.

[Read More: How To Write A Love Letter To Your Girlfriend]

Originality And Sincerity Over Cliché

So rather than resorting to clichés or phrases that you’ve heard in films, the best love letter emerges from thinking about the person’s qualities, the reasons you enjoy their company, the reasons you find them attractive. It might help to make a list in your head, or on paper, of all the things you appreciate in them and why.

The Perfect Love Letter - Originality And Sincerity Over Cliché

Are these things common in many of your friends or are they particular to the one you love? Are they things you admire in that someone? Or are they things you simply expect? Do their qualities make you feel differently about them, and how?

Now add to that list all the good things that these qualities bring out in you. What is it about that person that makes you feel so comfortable and at ease with them? What is it about them that makes you think they will be a good partner for you? Have a think about all the warm feelings that come to you when you think of your lover and make a note of all of these.

The Beginning

Start by telling the recipient of your letter why you value them. Mention first all the qualities and talents that you see in them. And then tell them what that means for you.

The Perfect Love Letter - The Beginning

See how that fits into your personality. Some things to consider are the things you share with your love as well as the aspects that are different, yet complementary.

Continuing on, focus on a few more important questions like:

  • What are the things that have brought you closer together and make you feel that this is the person to whom you want to write your most intimate of thoughts?
  • Is it perhaps because they have shown courage in tough times? Or tender kindness towards others when it mattered?
  • Or are they deserving of your trust because they have quietly and calmly always been there but never demanded undue attention?

Maybe your lover is someone who has outwardly shown their qualities and talents but who may not know that you have noticed them. Tell them. Maybe your lover is used to getting a lot of attention but you want to tell them that this is different and that you consider them to be special in a way that others don’t. What do you see in your lover that others do not?

[Read More:Emotional Love Letter]

The Love Letter: The Meat Of The Matter

Next, write of all the actions and deeds your lover did to earn the love you have for them. When did you start to feel this way? What were the moments at which you realised you felt something special for them, and just how you came to know.

The Perfect Love Letter - The Meat Of The Matter

Tell them which events had an impact on the development of your feelings and what they made you feel at different stages. Maybe your love had developed very slowly with little interaction at first, but you slowly started to notice them more often to want to be closer to them, and to tell them that you like them. Was it like a slowly blossoming flower that continues to grow? Or maybe there was one day or night when suddenly your feelings changed and you were overwhelmed with emotion? Mention when that was, if you truly feel that way.

Your lover will feel privileged to be reminded of your developing love for them and happy that you can share these thoughts.

[Read More: Love Letter to Girlfriend ]

A Perfect Love Letter: Embracing Honesty

The Perfect Love Letter - Embracing Honesty

You should never be afraid to be honest and open in a letter to someone you care for. It is okay to say when you found things hard and when you were not full of confidence. If you can confide in your letter about a time when the recipient made you feel happy and safe and confident, they will be extremely touched, as this is something we do not often hear in writing or in speech.

Do not hold back from mentioning things that you think could be better and how your relationship might be improved. Tell your lover how you want your life to be and invite them to be part of that. How do you think the two of you could make the changes that will bring you to a state of happiness together? We all know the world is far from perfect. Whoever is going to read the letter will be honoured to read that together you can be stronger, make things better and achieve what you wish in your lives.

Have Your Say About The Future

Now write about how you imagine the future. Where do you want your life to take you, and what do you want to do. Why is the recipient of your letter the best person for you to share that future with? What do you imagine doing together? Tell them about the places you would like to take them and the new places you want to go. Invite them into your world as you want it to be.

The Perfect Love Letter - Have Your Say About The Future

Make it clear that you believe this future to be both a dream and a potential reality. Tell them what you need them to do for you, and what you want them to need from you. In a healthy relationship there must be a balance between meeting the needs of both parties. We cannot have everything we want and give nothing up. Relationships are about compromise and it will be brilliant if you can explore this in your letter.

What compromises would you make for your love and what compromises do you ask of them? Show that you understand that achieving your goals together may not be easy but that you are ready to make the effort in order to get somewhere you both want to be.

Describe to your lover how it will feel when you get there. Describe how you imagine things will be if you could be together as you wish and how this would make you feel.

Taking About The Future: Why It Matters So Much

Thinking about spending your future with someone shows a great commitment to them, and there is no doubt that your lover will read this and feel truly lucky to have someone so dedicated to them and able to express those feelings.

The Perfect Love Letter - Taking About The Future Matters

Try to picture what it might be like to grow older together and tell them what this would mean to you. How would it feel to make the promise that you are ready to care for each other when you need help and ready to share the best and the worst bits of life? Be as honest as you can be. There is no need to try to say things that are insincere. Say what you feel and what is true for you.

The most effective communication is that which is clear and to-the-point. The reader of the letter will know when something is exaggerated or made up and so it is vital to tell what you know to be true – for you.

Concluding Your Love Letter

Now we come towards the conclusion of your letter. You might want to start off by reassuring your lover that they can confide in you, as you have done in them.
Make a few practical suggestions on how to move forward in your relationship and what steps can be taken to help propel you towards the future you long to share. You can tell them what you feel the next steps should be.

The Perfect Love Letter - Concluding Your Love Letter

Whether your lover is someone you recently met, or your life partner, every single relationship needs continued effort and attention, so please do think about how to keep the communication lines open for both parties and how to maintain a healthy balance of time spent on each other.

A successful relationship involves both people being able to express themselves freely and without any fear. If it is appropriate and you are ready to make a commitment to your love, you might tell them that there is no time at which you will not answer their call and no request that is too much to ask. But there is no single formula, because all romances are unique, all couples have their own dynamics.

A Love Letter: A Moment Preserved In Time

The most wonderful thing about writing a love letter is the fact that it is a one-off snapshot of how you’re feeling and what someone means to you. There are as many different ways to say “I love you” as there are different people in the world. Embrace the way in which you want to communicate your love. If this is through placing a pressed flower in the sheet of letter paper in the envelope, or by adding a photo of yourself as a keep-safe for your lover, or if you simply want the words to do the talking – all are fine.

The Perfect Love Letter - A Moment Preserved In Time

It is always nice to sign off a love letter with a kiss or a hug, but whatever you feel is best for you and your lover, those are the words you should use. Some relationships involve daily interactions; some will stretch across great distances. Some couples express their affection very openly and others are more cautious. You should use the language and tone that you are most comfortable with and this will invite your lover to do the same. Remember to end the letter with a gesture towards the future and try to let them know that you would love to hear from them too.

A Wonderful Act That’s Not Just For Your Lover

Once you have completed your letter, you will feel a warm sense of satisfaction as you have captured your feelings for its recipient and you can rest assured that this will make them feel treasured and beloved. You will have a done a great thing for their confidence, for their self-esteem and for the relationship between the two of you.

The Perfect Love Letter - A Wonderful Act

What’s more is that you will also have done wonders for your own confidence and self-esteem, as you will have expressed the thoughts and feelings you have towards your lover with the beautiful range of emotions that your love stirs up in you.

For sample love letters, be sure to check out our samples here and here, and be sure to look here for inspiration and samples as well. Good luck!

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